"The Numbers Don't Lie"

Wow, just read my old entries in "here". Was moved by the entry on October 24, 2006-"the sun feels like the pearly gates of heaven on my face" or some shit (whoops trying to balance my irreverence). Ahem...

In a numinous state, the older I get, the more patterns appear to me.

In Child Development theory, a child 0-5 is engaged in pre-math when they are able to recognize patterns-whether they be, shapes, colors, rhythms, etc. In all the different K-6 schools I attended growing up around Oahu, I received check minuses, S minuses and straight up, minuses in mathematics. I definitely noticed that pattern early on! My inadequacies in fundamental math caught up to me at San Francisco State University (SFSU), so I decided to take a break from school to work as a live-in caregiver at a home for adults with developmental disabilities until I left in pursuit of an uber-brain quenching. Had I not left SFSU, I may have never affirmed my passion for television and film, critical thinking, experiential learning, post-colonial anthropology, grassroots post-modernism, learned more about myself through using my body (creatively & fitness-wise) and most importantly my fucking dedication to the Early Childhood Education field and its expansion, neurobiology, understanding children through neurobiology and essentially understanding myself for the first time in my then 21 years.

Back to my initial sentiment, I love math, with its patterns, variables, what if's, symmetry, exponents/fractals, etc. Technically, I still operate at a pre-algebraic level (A in high school Geometry) but I feel confident that one day I will find a nurturing and creative teacher or approach that can help me to understand these abstract numerals and signs, especially through nature and day-to-day relationships. & after I am competent in that area, I look forward to creating a developmentally appropriate and comprehensive mathematical Early Childhood Education curriculum using symmetry in nature and the social-emotional experience to connect to the abstractions of math. I mean, really, do K-College teachers have to conduct the process of learning in the most sensory-deprived and compartmentalized environments devoid of any concrete experiences and relationships?

(Jump cut)

To address my title, no, it's not original. A teacher once told me that I should avoid using cliches. Ha ha. Because we are in these post-modern times, I re-appropriated the cynical connotation of cliches! They remind us of "something familiar" and this feeling of familiarity-really just a neuro-axon super myelinated through repetition-is rooted in the social-emotional realm. Something familiar feels good-less energy expended on an already established path ways-therefore, cliches=less energy=good! Since cliches capture so much in so little, they are also the quickest and most convenient way to get to one's feelings. This is valuable knowledge to people in advertising who understand this psychology. Cutting-edge neuroscience uncovers human's emotional rudders that subconsciously guide ALL of our decisions. This is also valuable knowledge for teachers who can increase learning effectiveness by following the child's interest-what the child wants (and is ready) to learn. I wonder who else this knowledge would be valuable to?...Cliches are also a reminder that the literal words are meaningless and its the comprehension of ideas behind the abstract units of shapes, rhythms, phonemes, etc. that give life to the written and spoken word. That was directed towards you, sassy grammarwhores. On the flip-side, anti-cliches! The first one that came to mind was the album title Punk in Drublic. What fun!

On a more day-to-day frame, one of my past-times is educating myself through Wikipedia. Yes, I understand the nature of Wikipedia, but I mean I look up stuff like cliche, Mali, the etymology of dildo. I doubt someone is going to go out of their way to give biased facts on those subjects. It's a trip to me! Try pronouncing synecdoche. It's a fun word! I saw a link to reification and gasped when I saw the word fallacy in parenthesis. I want to take another English Class or self-teach/start a zine collab?? I'm glad I have the ideas behind the words, but what good are the ideas if I can't communicate them to anyone, let alone in a self-expressive kinda way. I really need to work on refining my interpretations and strengthening my transitions in between my ideas, especially because many of my ideas are interdisciplinary...Uggghh, takes so long though and there are no designated margins to write in.

Ever since I have somewhat settled and live in a more routine and predictable way, I can recognize the patterns around me, which is crucial to mental and spiritual health.


Anyway, I retire, velvet robe and scotch in hand.